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Groogle

This is one of many jokes and humorous articles I collected, mainly from USENET and similar sources in the early to mid 1990s. They're really not very interesting nowadays.

From owner-freebsd-chat@FreeBSD.ORG Sat Aug 23 06:56:35 1997
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Date: Fri, 22 Aug 1997 17:12:46 -0400 (EDT)
From: Chuck Robey <chuckr@glue.umd.edu>
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On Fri, 22 Aug 1997, Cy Schubert - ITSD Open Systems Group wrote:

> Here's some Friday humor.

Politely, I want to say "I can top that".  Here, this came from an Air
Force site:


>From [deleted]
Date: Wed, 30 Jul 97 16:18:11 EST
From: [also deleted]
Subject: fwd: Air Force Maintenance

These are alleged to be some actual maintenance complaints submitted
by US Air Force pilots and the replies from the maintenance crews:

Problem:  "Left inside main tire almost needs replacement."
Solution: "Almost replaced left inside main tire."

Problem:  "Test flight OK, except autoland very rough."
Solution: "Autoland not installed on this aircraft."

Problem #1:  "#2 Propeller seeping prop fluid."
Solution #1: "#2 Propeller seepage normal."
Problem #2:  "#1, #3, and #4 propellers lack normal seepage."

Problem:  "The autopilot doesn't." Signed off: "IT DOES NOW."

Problem:  "Something loose in cockpit."
Solution: "Something tightened in cockpit."

Problem:  "Evidence of hydraulic leak on right main landing gear."
Solution: "Evidence removed."

Problem:  "DME volume unbelievably loud."
Solution: "Volume set to more believable level."

Problem:  "Dead bugs on windshield."
Solution: "Live bugs on order."

Problem:  "Autopilot in altitude hold mode produces a 200 fpm descent."
Solution: "Cannot reproduce problem on ground."

Problem:  "IFF inoperative."
Solution: "IFF always inoperative in OFF mode."

Problem:  "Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick."
Solution: "That's what they're there for."

Problem:  "Number three engine missing."
Solution: "Engine found on right wing after brief search."
------------------------------------------
SGT Zeno K. Gamble, U.S. Army, OSD
(703)693-0566, Room 3E856
BRAC Alumnus / Pentagon Veteran
Essayons Lifetime Member
------------------------------------------




----------------------------+-----------------------------------------------
Chuck Robey                 | Interests include any kind of voice or data
chuckr@eng.umd.edu          | communications topic, C programming, and Unix.
213 Lakeside Drive Apt T-1  |
Greenbelt, MD 20770         | I run Journey2 and picnic, both FreeBSD
(301) 220-2114              | version 3.0 current -- and great FUN!
----------------------------+-----------------------------------------------


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